=A View Through the Window=

a challenge of change

Do you RawFu?

You guessed it. I'm with Bunny.

I grabbed the Vita Mix, took a big gulp of green smoothie:
Head first into tomorrow ... RAW for 100 days.

Stay tuned. =^..^=

one year ago ...today.::over the moon::.

The day began like all the recent others. The sun rose and I drank a cup of tea. But the day would have a fork in the road that would lead two souls to a new adventure together ... And that is the part I will begin with.

A beautiful Sunday in July cannot be wasted so as soon as I rinsed my tea mug, and dressed, I got onto my bike and headed out for the park. There I spread my faithful old flower strewn tablecloth I use as a blanket. Out came a new book & with my feet atop the thick grass, there I spent the next six hours under my favorite tree. Little did I know at home my phone was ringing over and over, with someone trying desparately to reach me.

When the heat of the day became too much to handle even under a huge oak by the water, I gathered my belongings and headed home. At my door I was greeted by one very hungry cat claiming to be nearly starved to death having not eaten since five am, and next to him a folded stack of papers tucked under the mat. Talking to the cat, probably telling him I was going as fast as I could, I opened the door leaning over to grab the papers at the same time. As the door swung open I was caught by the scribbled writing on top of the first page. I stopped in my tracks.

Across the top of the printed page was hand written:

I have a dog for you!!!
We are picking her up Tuesday... Kate.

I stepped into the cottage and set my armload of Sunday daydreaming things down, and stood reading the rest of the pages to try and gain understanding of what was in my hands. The several printed pages on which the handwritten note was scrawled, were emails. The many emails sent back and forth all that very day, beginning early and ending before noon. A corgi had been orphaned that was in need of a home. A very special girl that once the word was out, would be scooped up with lightening speed so time was of the imperative. Someone knew how desperately I was wishing for a puppers to call my own and I was nowhere to be found. So my friend, Kate, started calling people creating a chain of help until she found, and talked the person (Joyce) into giving one little corgi ::my::wish::come::true:: to me. Sight unseen.

I was dumbfounded. Just like that. A corgi in my life again was too much to hope for so I had stopped believing. If you only knew how hard I had tried to adopt another faerie pony and what I had been put through trying, you would be startled. But I must have still way down deep, never given up ::wishing:: because here was the proof.

A friend had counciled me after another adoption falling through in April, that I was having to try too hard to find a dog. That it shouldn't be like this, that I should let a dog find me. By July, I had listened.

...And one found me.

Come Tuesday I had heard the details of how it all had happened on that fateful Sunday morning, and I had read the emails so many times I could recite them from memory. At the appointed time, Kate and I got into the car to drive to where my ... yes my corgi and I would meet. The person that had taken in this corgi just happened to be planning to visit her sister not an hour away from where I lived and would bring the dog to met me there.

It was blazing hot. We were having a typical July heatwave so both Kate and I were delighted to be driving upward into the mountains thinking we would find relief. After getting lost twice, we pulled into the long dirt drive lined with scrub oak trees and watched the plumes of dust raise behind us. Even in the mountains it was a typical July, dry and way too hot. As we got closer to the house, my heart began to pound loudly in my chest. In view there was a pen under the trees filled with puppies. Corgi puppers! Three of them watching us as our car pulled up and stopped. Ahead of us was a woman coming to greet us. But all I remember is her waving her hand towards the little fenced-in yard at the house filled with barking dacshies and one perfectly perfect, honey and white ... Corgi Princess.

"That's her", Joyce said. I headed straight for the gate and and the rest is a blurr. Kate talked with Joyce (the incredible person that gifted me with Caila), asked questions, took in the information including the file of papers (that later I would read to find that I had indeed, in the Corgi world of breeding at least, scored big time. BIG time) ... but all I saw was one perfectly perfect corgi pupper I had been dreaming of ... that was being intrusted to me. ME. No strings.

I remember Joyce saying, "Do you want to try her?" and assuring me, "If it doesn't work out, I'll meet you half way to pick her back up."

And both Kate and I, nearly if not exactly the very same time, saying YES! That I wanted to take this dog without reservation!

I remember being afraid that I would get to the appointed meeting at 11:30 and the person (I had never met) would change their mind, or not like me and I would have to go home with my heart broken again. There had never once been any question in my mind from the moment I knew of her existence, that I was taking this corgi home if offered. Not a doubt. So to hear the words: "Do you want to try her?" I probably gasped. (are you kidding?!)

Later in the car, with this amazing little creature half on my lap and staring up at me, I finally was able to exhale. I had been holding my breath for two and a half days not sure if to believe this could really happen. But the bond between Caila and I was instantaneous and tighter than super glue. Had Joyce changed her mind I would have taken, Caila and moved to Australia. (I can not to this day believe anyone could have EVER given up this particular creature, she is so special--but Joyce had five corgyn she belonged to already ... And I think she knew she was but the conduit to help this particular little corgi find her forever person.)

No one could pry Caila from my arms now. Even after only a day I would have fought with everything I had to keep her. And as it worked out, Caila Fae and I were two souls meant to find each other and care for one another. So every time I am tempted to stop believing in my dreams, when I begin to falter and want to give up reaching for happiness, I look at Caila. I would lay down my life for her. She has mended my shattered heart & made it grow bigger.

Never never ever give up on your dreams. Have paitence and believe that the universe is working on making your wishes come true. Seal it with a prayer in moonlight. You only need to ask ... let go, and have faith.

After all, isn't faith believing in things that can't be seen?

.:: click here to meet Caila ::.

=^..^= love, zU

the dolls tea

The day was announced with the faerie windchimes in the trees ringing out their deep ::dong::dooong::dong::dimmm:: and the dolls awoke in an instant rubbing the sleep from their eyes. Sitting up in bed they each realized the day they await for each spring was here!
Today was extra special.
Today they would be seen by not just human children as they really are, but by anyone that believes in the power of real will on this day, see dolls as children see them.
And in celebration there was a faerie's invitation sent out across the world to join the dolls together with hearts of children everywhere.

Charity could hear the children of the household in the kitchen already and quickly reached for her apron. Yes, there it was sitting where she could find ... where her child had placed it. As she put it on, William threw open the curtains to see the day and gasped.
It was snowing! April snow? This could not be ... No.
"Not today" ::sighed:: William.

Charity came over to the window to see what was the matter. When William said, "snow" she too gasped and immediately opened the window sash. Snow today would change all of the plans! She reached her tiny hand outside to feel the snow, but something wasn't right. The air was warm. There was a slight breeze and something was floating down from the sky onto her hand. Startled by it's touch she pulled her hand inside and felt one of the flakes that had landed there. It was soft and velvety. Not cold at all and did not melt. By this time several of the others in the nursery had gathered at the window and were giggling.

Charity, tilting her head to the side listened carefully and heard William laughing. He leaned over to her and taking her hand, placed more of the snowflakes there. Charity closed her fingers around them and then she too began to laugh. Bringing her fist to her nose, she opened her palm and breathed in deeply and smiled. Appleblossoms! The wind was carrying the petals in the air like snowflakes. She could now feel them under her toes where the wind was tossing them through the open window onto the nursery floor. Today was indeed meant to be magical.

And that is how Tuesday began.

**The characters in this story are from a series called, A Dolls Letters Home. It was a series of short stories (letters) I began to write quite a number of years ago when a doll was left on my doorstep in need of repair. Wanting to thank the person without embarassing her by letting her know I knew who she was, but at the same time let her know how much her thoughfulness meant to me ... The doll began to write her letters telling her of her new life in an enchanted cottage where she was left at the door. A regular following of readers at the gift givers place of work began (where the letters written in script like those of days gone by, seemed to anonymously arrive on her desk) and consequently were watched for with anticipation by growing numbers. Someone once made copies of the letters for their daughter to read and then someone else did too ... eventually arriving in the hands of many children in the community. And the rest as they say is ... Well, lets just say one little dolls life became a faery-tale. I hope to someday publish the letters together bound in a small book.

An introduction of some of the characters:

Charity is blind. A 1937 Mme Alexander Princess Elizabeth doll, her tin eyes having turned cloudy many years ago ... Sweet William is a 1930s Knickerbocker teddybear with curly woolen hair and a heart big enough to cover the earth. His best friend is, Sir Loved-a-Lot a 1950 Steiff bear with golden hair like sunshine and who wears his heart on his sleeve. Faith and Hope live in Charity's pockets and go everywhere with her. The twins belonged to my mother and sleep in a real heartshaped basket in which they arrived in 1925 to a then 5 year old birthday girl that passed along the belief to her daughter--this author, that all dolls become real ... if you believe they can.

And Jennabelle? Did you by chance to meet? Jennabelle is the mistress of a little cottage where tattered toys go to stay while they await for the love of a child to make them whole again. All are welcome. None are turned away. Even a family of mice that sleep on pillows in the window have made the cottage home. And considering that the mistress is a tabby cat ... this itself is enchanting.

I believe in the power of a child's imagination being bigger than us all.

The website for, A Doll's Letters Home is in the process of being built. I hope when it is finished, you will each and every one come to visit. Have a cup of tea with us in a chair by the window and meet all of the occupants of the enchanted cottage. Consider yourself invited.

=^..^= love, zU

SAVED ... something is planned for this space.

from chichi's point of view

Hiya peeples ... just me Cheeeeecheeee! Peeking in on momma to see what's she's doin' in that there inside place. She sits at summthin' called a drafting table. My house is just outside the big window next to it where I can see her. She snuck a picture of me hangin out on my treehouse ramp to shows yooz guys.

I'm always up here watching her she says. Says everytime she looks up, there I am! Hey ... She's always inside she is ::sighhhh:: and not out here with MEeeeee. CheeeeeCheeee! I is out here in my treeeeeees!

::Ahem:: I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND here in my tree! I do! Her name is Cathy ... Human momma person named her that ... I think it's short for summthin', I forget ... Hard to think around here sometimes lately. Just a sec ... Shhhh! Cathy, be quiet! I'm talkin' to the peeples here ... Sorry 'bout that. She's talkin' at me about needing twigs or grass or ... Oh, yeah. That's why momma named her Cathy. That's it! My girls name is CHATTY Cathy! And ... ummm ... she is ... Ya know. Chatty. Talk talk talk. Sheeeesh. Gurrrrrlz.

I love my Cathy, I do. (Dang ... don't tell her I said that, K? She'll get all kissy-face on me and well ... She might let me catch her. I haven't figured out what to do yet ... You know, if I ever actually catched her. I justs likes ta chase her. Dunno why. When I asks human mommy person, she just winks and tells me to keep chasing. That I'll figure it out. Dunno.)

Gotta go peeples. Cathy wants me to find more twigs and leaves for the house she's building. Now whataya suppose we need a nesthouse for in this beautiful weather? Its beaUimous outside under the stars. I tell ya ... Gurlz are soooo weird!

-^..^- who loves ya? Chichi does!
(hi auntie carol ... lookie me auntie margarita!)

doing the dance of joy

Ever have a day when you wake up and just know that today, there is an adventure out there waiting for you? The air is just the right temperature and is breezing in through the open window ... The curtains move in little waves. The flowers are beckoning to you from just beyond the billowing lace. Come outside and play you hear in whispers and shouts. A butterfly flitters past and you could swear you saw her wink.
An invation for you to come out and join the party ...

It's spring! You cannot be inside!


Ready and packed in a split second for spring will not wait. You have your sketchbook in hand and watercolors clutched tight. Grab a bottle of water and you turn towards the door ... And there in your path are two huge brown eyes watching your every move. Was she not asleep in the chair but a moment ago?

You smile at the big brown eyes and say, Yes. But of course! It wouldn't be an adventure if anyone was left behind, your voice is almost singing as you turn the doorknob.

Then you do the ::DaNcE::Of::JoY:: down the road, watching a little dog bounce with glee at what unknowns are ahead, just happy to be right there in that very moment.
And suddenly you realize she is right ... It's the journey.
The journey is the adventure.

I will be the gladdest thing
Under the sun!
I will touch a hundred flowers
And not pick one.

I will look at cliffs and clouds
With quiet eyes,
Watch the wind bow down the grass,
And the grass rise.

And when lights begin to show
Up from the town,
I will mark which must be mine,
And then start down!
--edna st. vincent millay

wishing you a glorious journey of moments.
=^..^= love, zU

We are all in the gutter,but some of us are looking at the stars.--oscar wilde

Well, this is just getting to be a habit.
Me disapearing ::poof::gone::
Sadness dropping in unannounced.

With a suddenness of a flash flood ...
not a word to anyone because I couldn't.
And I am sorry.

My heart is having troubles wrapping itself around the things of late. In the past year much has happened. I thought my heart would stop beating more than once from sadness. First my beloved four-legged constant companion, then my best human friend passed away & only weeks after him, his corgi died too leaving a hole in my life the size of the moon to become the size of the universe. Three losses of such magnitude in six-weeks took a toll. Other things happening concurrently made me feel helpless to stop The sisters Fate from crushing me.

Then summer held for me happiness (I got my ::wish::), however unmeasurable sadness came along (that precious puppy died in my arms), then the greatest ::EVER:: of ::JOY:: (the fae saw fit to bestow to me another puppers) and I was lifted to cloud nine. I felt hope return. But there was so much more happening in my life. All in all it was a rollercoaster year and a half of emotion and it has pulled at my heart until it is unable to cope with more. I am raw.

Now yet again something unpleasant has occured and I am trying to gain my composure and stay in the glow of starlight ... fighting the urge to simply curl up under the trees and hide in the shadows.

Without going into details, of which you do not wish to hear (trust me) I am having to do something I suppose should be expected, but still it comes as an unpleasant shock to me as I truly wanted to believe the day would never come. Something I do not wish to be the one to do involving an elderly parent. It must be done. And worse yet, I may likely break a promise when doing so. It is tearing me up even though I am aware of no other better choice.

So as I gather the lose ends of my life and tie them together again, I beg of you to understand. The computer has sat quietly, screen dark waiting for my return. Packages have arrived (and I know they are filled to popping with magic) yet they sit on the table unopened. I look towards them but cannot bring myself to take the steps over and unwrap even one. Emails sent to me are in the gazillions, all unanswered less even opened yet. I am finding posting hard. I don't want to be negative. So I stay away not knowing what to say or how to say it. I want to be here but happy things seem far away sometimes. I am finding I need time to heal. I am in the shadows watching the light just beyond.

Soon I will be here with a smile at my fingertips & stories to share. I believe the shadows will be overtaken by light. I promise to reach for it. Oh I will tell you of my beautiful puppers. She can make a spirit soar with the most soulful eyes ever given to a corgi. It is nearly her birthday ... Perhaps a party? I know she will invite you each and every one. I will also tell you of my corgyn boy that now dances every day with faeries. Watch the sidebar for his story. Bring tissues.

For those I was in the midst of sending treasures & notes, they are not forgotten. Even though it has been seemingly forever and you must feel lost of hope ... It is bothering me too that things are not done. I just can't seem to find a way to keep myself in a gear moving forward faster than very s l o w if that. I feel like my feet are in deep mud and every movement is made with such great effort I am unsure if I can continue without rest. I get done so little as of late. I don't know how else to explain. I feel the weight of the world on my shoulders presently.

.:: how many robins can you spy? ::.

Spring is here bursting at the seams and calling to me. For those that have followed my blog along for a while, you know what that means for me. Pure bliss. I immerse myself in my gardens and the moments spent there become perfect moments. The timing could not be better. I need this now.

In my studio, another refuge, I find myself staring up at the glittering silver stars which hang from the high ceiling. Along the ceiling edge I wrote a favorite Oscar Wilde quote that reminds that we are all in the same boat. We all have problems but some of us choose to look at the bright side; To be grateful for what we have & think positively. We can chose to not dwell on the negative and be happy with what we have now. We can choose to see the brightness of the universe.

"...some of us are looking at the stars."

Yep Yep Yep.
I will keep looking up at the stars!
All will be better soon. It will.

missing you.
=^..^= love, zU

one of a circle of hearts ... nature is where the art is: Delila Jemaiel

The phenomenon that has the potential to quickly become known as the event of the season, has gotten off to a roaring start this year. Having more than doubled in size from last year, OneWorld-OneHeart has artists all over the world visiting each other to say hello. With more joining in every hour, seriously I'm having trouble keeping track.

The brain child of Lisa Oceandreamer [Heart of the Nest] was a little idea that caught on big. What if a few bloggers each gave away a little gift, just to entice and thank each other for visiting? Word was sent out by invitation and a master list was created of participants. And it grew and it grew. Like the Grinches heart, it got too big to be contained. Watching this idea bouncing about from blog to blog one can't help smiling at what has happened. A huge circle of new acquaintances are being made.

With so many incredible artists and their blogs out there to visit, one can easily become overwhelmed by gorgeous ... I personally haven't made it through the list of blogs to visit yet. Not even close! But I have already noted some incredible work out there. So I thought I would begin to share with you, ones I can not imagine having missed.

I'll start half way around the world from where I sit typing.

One of the most delightful blogs (and even more so is the blogs owner) is a little studio called, Sepia Art. Run by Delila Jemaiel, Sepia-Art Studio is a beautiful hidden gem of a nest in Finland. This blog features the works of an artist with a wonderfully unique vision. When you visit, you are immediately swept into her realm of faerytales and soft music, transparent colors and sheer magic. Her writing is precious and has the eloquence of a great piece of art.

Delila is as charming as the beautiful pieces of paper art she creates. Visit her in her tiny studio where she dreams of the woods and be taken into another time, somewhere between now and then. Where tea is an art and you can see the past peeking through the windows.

If you haven't yet stopped by Sepia-Art Studio, don't miss this one. Say hello.

Alas be prepared ... make tea.
You may find it difficult to leave.

=^..^= love, zU
.:: list of OWOH particapants to visit ::.

a heARTfelt offering ... no strings attached... except maybe Heartstrings.

You have discovered one of the magical pieces of the
. . . :: OneWorld-OneHeart event giveaway :: . . .

Oh dear ::^..^::
The faeries are running so behind with the stitching ...
Tiny little pieces, still undone. The sun setting far too soon.

But inside the studio awaits a surprise ... soon to be complete.
To be unveiled to all of you arriving at the doorstep to see.

Please, while you wait have some tea.
Cookie? Take two. I insist. The tiny star shaped ones were made just for you. They are wishes ... for luck. Sprinkled with real stardust & blessed by the moon.

The smallest of the enchanted ones are working on something special ::for YOU:: and would be so disapointed should you not return to peek ... Perhaps with one more sleep? Or two?

.::I HOPE YOU WILL RETURN TO SEE THE MAGIC::.

This is part of the OneWorld-OneHeart event giveaway ...
Our lovely event coordinator is:
. . :: Ms.Lisa Oceandreamer :: . .
The rules of the game are Ooh so simple. You need only to comment on this post if you would like to take part in the drawing. You need not have a blog to enter this drawing ... but must leave another way for me to contact you. (if you haven't a blog, please leave your email address).
Your name will be placed with the others into a vintage teacup, with one name to be drawn out by a hug of VERY excited baby bears on Thursday, February 14th at 8pm PST... The winners name will be posted that evening before midnight.

I will HaPpiLy mail toot sweet by sparrow post to anywhere you are ... worldwide.
Everyone is welcome to play! ... I hope you will.

and just for you:

.:: a complete list of the participating blogs to visit ::.

=^..^= love, zU

.:: MORE DETAILS TO FOLLOW ::.

a magical place

We could use a little springtime here.
Gloomy and cold outside today.

Snow predicted for tomorrow.
Outdoors all the little root children are tucked in for the nights, asleep underground perhaps soon covered with a blanket of white.

Inside our tiny dwelling the little bears & animals are gathered about the fire, watching expectantly out windows for the first snowflake, and staring at the hoomans of the cottage to see what will be read aloud tonight by firelight.

Someone has left a copy of jill barklem's, Winter Story where I can see it ...

(I expect it is a ::wish:: to hear the tale of The Snow Ball again.)
It is a favorite of my little brood.

They Ooo and Ahhh at the pictures of The Grand Palace of Ice built by the mice of Brambly Hedge, a palace carved from ice in which to hold a winters dance. For days the boys of the cottage talk of nothing else but how they will build one too ... The girls talk of what they will wear, sneaking peeks at the boys wondering if one might ask them to attend. The boys pretend not to notice, but clearly are delighted.

Tonight ... Potato soup w/carrots and fresh cornbread for dinner. Candied ginger pieces passed out later for a treat. Beeswax candles to be lit leaving their yellow glow in steamed windows.

Perhaps a second watching of this movie, then asleep dreaming of waking to an icy wonderland.

Winter isn't so bad.
It fills the need to make excuses to stay in and nest. To hold up and cuddle under quilts and read until the light disappears outside and you can't see the pages anymore without lighting a lamp.

The talk of summer from friends of the Australian blogland makes me itch to go out and play in the dirt. To fill vases with bouquets of bright flowers, pick raspberries and pull weeds in the sun. Alas, it is not the view from the windows today.

Today it will have to be the paintings of flowers remembered, with my feet in the fire and a corgi princess at my side. Tonight stories of mice that live in a magical place close enough to touch will warm my heart.

Snow is on the way ::sigh:: It is an inside day.

Looking out from within. A winters reflection.
Wish you were here.
=^..^= love, zU